// data
Names = new Array("ALIENS","U.N. SECURITY COUNCIL","POSH & BECKS","HAMSTER","MICHAEL PORTILLO","TONY BLAIR","OSAMA BIN LADEN","RUSSELL CROWE","ELVIS","GEORGE BUSH","SADDAM HUSSEIN","STRIPPER","SPICE GIRL");
Middles = new Array("KIDNAPPED BY","SAW","SEEN WITH","HAD SEX WITH","IN KINKY SEX ROMP WITH","PUNCHED","RUN OVER BY BUS DRIVEN BY","IN SECRET TALKS WITH","TO MARRY","IN DRUNKEN BRAWL WITH","BRIBED","HELD HOSTAGE BY","MET");
Ends = new Array("ON MOON","ON MARS","ON SECRET CARIBBEAN ISLAND","IN DOWNING STREET","IN SOHO VICE-DEN","ON CLAPHAM COMMON","AT MOTORWAY SERVICE STATION");
Quotes = new Array("SAY SCIENTISTS","SAYS HOUSEWIFE","SAYS WHITEHOUSE SPOKESMAN","SAY POLICE");


// function to write the newspaper into the current document.
function CreateNewspaper()
{
    document.write("<table align='center' bgcolor='white' text='black' cellspacing='0' cellpadding='8' width='300' border='0'>");
    document.write("<tr>");
    document.write("<td width='200' bgcolor='red' align='center'>");
    document.write("<font face='Arial, Helvetica' size='5' color='white'><i><b>the DAILY</b></i></font>");
    document.write("<br>");
    document.write("<font face='Arial, Helvetica' size='7' color='white'><i><b>SQUIT</b></i></font>");
    document.write("</td>");
    document.write("<td width='100' align='center'>");
    document.write("<a href='#' onClick='window.location.reload()'>");
    document.write("<font face='Arial, Helvetica' size='1' color='black'>In tomorrow's SQUIT:<br>");
    document.write(GenerateTomorrowsNews());
    document.write("</font></a>");
    document.write("</td>");
    document.write("</tr>");
    document.write("<tr>");
    document.write("<td colspan='2' align='left'>");
    document.write("<font face='Arial, Helvetica' size='5'><b>");
    document.write(GenerateHeadline());
    document.write("</b></font>");
    document.write("</td>");
    document.write("</tr>");
    document.write("<tr><td colspan='2' background='images/paper.gif'><font size='6'>&nbsp;</font></td></tr>");
    document.write("<tr>");
    document.write("<td width='200' background='images/paper.gif'>&nbsp;</td>");
    document.write("<td width='100' bgcolor='black' align='center'>");
    document.write("<a href='index.html'>");
    document.write("<font face='Arial, Helvetica' color='white' size='1'>SQUIT CIRCULATION FALLS</font>");
    document.write("</a>");
    document.write("</td>");
    document.write("</tr>");
    document.write("<tr>");
    document.write("<td colspan='2' background='images/paper.gif'>&nbsp;</td>");
    document.write("</tr>");
    document.write("</table>");
}


// function to return the headline string
function GenerateHeadline()
{
    var middle_prob = 0.8;
    var end_prob = 0.5;
    var quote_prob = 0.3;

    var Headline;
    var n1;
    var n2;
    var m;
    var e;
    var q;

    n1 = RoundDown(Names.length * Math.random());
    n2 = RoundDown(Names.length * Math.random());
    
    while(n2 == n1)
    {
        n2 = RoundDown(Names.length * Math.random());
    }

    m = RoundDown(Middles.length * Math.random());
    e = RoundDown(Ends.length * Math.random());
    q = RoundDown(Quotes.length * Math.random());

    // first name
    Headline = Names[n1];

    // middle and second name and end
    if(Math.random() < middle_prob)
    {
        Headline = Headline + " " + Middles[m] + " " + Names[n2];
        if(Math.random() < end_prob);
        {
            Headline = Headline + " " + Ends[e];
        }
    }
    else
    {
        Headline = Headline + " " + Ends[e];
    }

    // quote
    if(Math.random() < quote_prob)
    {
        Headline = "&quot;" + Headline + "&quot; " + Quotes[q];
    }

    return Headline;
}


// return the "in tomorrows..." string
function GenerateTomorrowsNews()
{
    return Names[RoundDown(Names.length * Math.random())] + " EXCLUSIVE";
}


// function that rounds down a number
function RoundDown(Num)
{
    return Math.round(Num - 0.5);
}